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Seeing Dave

Last night I went to see Dave Bazan at the Glass House. Right now he is going through a crisis of faith, and that figured in heavily to all of performances. Much of what he expressed was either fear of the separation this is causing between him and his wife or his general disdain for a God that has the audacity to send people to hell. I understand from the Inland Empire Weekly article published last week that he has decided he no longer needs Jesus and has rejected hell. Which makes perfect sense. Why would you need Jesus to save you if you do not believe in hell? Really the two theological concepts are tied together.

I feel his plunging into doubt is very brave. These questions he is asking about God and the nature of Christ are ones I simply can't ask. Dave has clearly been hurt by the actions of Christians. He mentioned that God seemed to historically be on the side of the white majority culture. I can see how he came to that conclusion. I also see the many ways in which God's Spirit today seems to be more active in emerging world countries. In contrast I also feel he is full of fear. In my (biased) opinion anyone who rejects the idea of a compassionate God who loves, forgive, accepts and redeems has to have some level of self-loathing that is based in a type of fear of knowing ones true self. But that belief is based in the idea that through my relationship with Christ I know myself better.

Dave's level of self-knowledge is profound as is his understanding of how this change in his belief system affects his life, family and friends. His decision is in no way flippant or careless. He was completely honest about this being painful. Which I guess puts in my heart a deeply felt respect. He is willing to look doubt in the face. He is not a man of shallow faith (he does have faith, in what I'm not sure). And I would rather listen to the music of a man who is honest and struggling than the pop-y sounds of 100 Contemporary Christian musicians.

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